A peek into my mind...

##### says:
how's work today

Bentonton says:
Fine. I haven't been very productive, but I'm not really getting behind either. I'm just taking my time getting back in to the swing of things... refamiliarizing myself with the workflow, etc.

Bentonton says:
But I have a lot of free time to waste if I don't concentrate...

Bentonton says:
So it's a danger situation.

##### says:
yes that's true

Bentonton says:
Basically I should be studying.

##### says:
in same position

##### says:
haha

Bentonton says:
And organizing my work... creating organization tools like excel worksheets for job status and to do list, etc.

##### says:
man u're organized

##### says:
puts me to shame

Bentonton says:
Back. Got a call from a client! Excitement!

##### says:
awesome!

Bentonton says:
If I get disorganized I self destruct because I don't do anything at all.

##### says:
yea true

Bentonton says:
That's the danger.

##### says:
same la

##### says:
but at least u've got it all sussed

Bentonton says:
That's happened to me many times in the past. So not only do I need to get organized, but I have to maintain it perfectly and NEVER get behind.

Bentonton says:
Because when I fall behind I procrastinate more and more.

##### says:
yea same

Bentonton says:
One difficult thing about my job now is that I have to work at 2 offices in different buildings.

Bentonton says:
I just promised the client who just called a quote, but the materials for that quote are in the other office, which I just returned from 10 minutes ago.

Bentonton says:
So the risk is that I'll procrastinate on that because I don't want to go back to the other office.

Bentonton says:
So I really have to discipline myself.

##### says:
oh yea that's true

##### says:
that's a pain!

Bentonton says:
Anyway, I'm going up to the canteen for lunch now. Great canteen here in the ##### building.

##### says:
is it ##### #####?

##### says:
wha

Bentonton says:
Signed my contract today so I'll show it to my landlord and explain why I'm behind on the rent and when I'll be completely caught up.

Bentonton says:
Yeah, it's ##### ##### building.

Bentonton says:
My company is owned by #### #####.

Bentonton says:
I also had a class to observe this morning, so I've had a taste of what it's going to be like when I start my teaching.

Bentonton says:
It'll be a pain when the class is not near my office.

Bentonton says:
A lot of traveling.

##### says:
yea that's true, but also a challenge

##### says:
that's cool

##### says:
!

##### says:
u're lucky!

Bentonton says:
Not sure if I'll go to the office super early, go to teach, then go back, or if I'll go to the office after my class, and work super late.

##### says:
wha

##### says:
do u have flexi hours

##### says:
and would u teach everyday?

Bentonton says:
I do have flexible hours, but it'll be better if I set a stable schedule.

Bentonton says:
Starting Oct. 1 I'll be teaching nearly every day.

Bentonton says:
That's how I'll be earning 30k.

Bentonton says:
But I only plan on doing this for 3 months now.

Bentonton says:
Because I want to focus on this job... very good prospects.

Bentonton says:
And I love the industry, and I love our product, and #### ##### is great to work for.

##### says:
wha

##### says:
lucky!

##### says:
i actually wish i was in your position

Bentonton says:
Just too far away lah!

##### says:
cause although ### is cool

##### says:
thing is .... there's no colleagues around still

##### says:
stIll

Bentonton says:
You must be desparate for your husband's affection when you get home... lucky guy.

##### says:
haha

##### says:
chur

Bentonton says:
I'm lucky too because Fanny really appreciates me.

Bentonton says:
Finally, someone who does.

##### says:
hehe

##### says:
see

##### says:
things do turn for the better la

Bentonton says:
In other news... I saw XOX on Monday at the meeting and it turned into a disaster.

##### says:
oh no

##### says:
how come

Bentonton says:
I asked for my phone back, and she ran away, and I ended up making an ass out of myself in front of ######### #####-#####.

Bentonton says:
I can't believe how she can be so unethical about the things she didn't return to me.

##### says:
oh shit

Bentonton says:
And I was surprised that after one year, she still is intent on refusing to deal with anything.

##### says:
what did u do

##### says:
u asked in front of her?

##### says:
i mean

##### says:
in front of ####?

Bentonton says:
I asked XOX in the lift lobby and she ran into the office.

Bentonton says:
And I followed her and asked again.

Bentonton says:
And started losing it.

##### says:
it was your phone?

##### says:
like or u gave it to her?

##### says:
as a gift?

Bentonton says:
Yes, my old phone.

##### says:
ah

##### says:
but if its a gift

Bentonton says:
No, it was the phone I owned before I even met XOX.

##### says:
she may have chucked it

Bentonton says:
But I recently lost my other phone, and the old one had my numbers on it.

Bentonton says:
If she threw it away, she should say so, and explain why.

##### says:
so she borrowed it?

Bentonton says:
No, it was one of the many many things she just never returned.

##### says:
oh man

##### says:
sux

Bentonton says:
Like my wallet, important documents, my backup hard drive with 10 years of important data...

Bentonton says:
And she refuses to even acknowledge any of it.

##### says:
sheesh

Bentonton says:
And none of my friends, even though they witnessed what happened, had the balls to confront her about it.

##### says:
well, just pretend its total loss

##### says:
and forget about it

##### says:
she's never going to acknowledge it happened

##### says:
and she won't admit it

Bentonton says:
It's easy to let go of the monetary stuff, but the other stuff, like my lost contacts and documents, and my 10 year-old emails, are hard to lose.

##### says:
yea true

Bentonton says:
And it's so hard to accept that someone I put so much love into and gave so much of my life to is capable of this.

##### says:
dude....u have to forget

##### says:
and move on

##### says:
live your life for now

##### says:
not for the past

Bentonton says:
I'm not the first person she did this to. I was so stupid to be with her.

##### says:
nooo

##### says:
u were meant to be with her

##### says:
so u could appreciate fanny now

Bentonton says:
I always accepted her "disownment" of her own parents, even though her own sister told me she was lying.

##### says:
silly

Bentonton says:
I always felt sorry for her because of the exes she claimed hurt her and stole from her.

Bentonton says:
But I really think it must have been lies or half-truths.

##### says:
well

##### says:
sometimes, its to get pity from the guy

##### says:
just remember

##### says:
as long as u're enjoying yourself now

##### says:
don't look back

##### says:
ok?

Bentonton says:
But I'll be reminded of this injustice all my life. You can't just forget. And besides the cherished memories, there are constantly things that remind you.

##### says:
that's true

##### says:
but make an effort!

Bentonton says:
Like when I lost my phone and though of my old phone as a source for my contacts.

Bentonton says:
Or when I apply for permanent residency and don't have my documents.

Bentonton says:
Or when I see a cherished photo of the happy times we shared together.

Bentonton says:
How can I make her see what she's done?

Bentonton says:
And get an honest answer to why she did it?

Bentonton says:
I just can't stand the injustice and the lack of heart.

##### says:
yea i don't get why she won't give u back your stuff

##### says:
doesn't make sense

Bentonton says:
She just didn't want to make the effort, that's all.

Bentonton says:
And I'm afraid she's just going to keep hurting people like this.

Bentonton says:
And I fear for her safety, because maybe one of those people will be less restrained about it than I have been.

##### says:
don't be afraid of what doesn't concern u anymore

##### says:
why waste your energy

Bentonton says:
It haunts me.

Bentonton says:
From time to time.

Bentonton says:
And hurts a lot.

##### says:
dont' let it

##### says:
it'll consume u8

Bentonton says:
Bye now.

Bentonton says:
I'm going to eat.